They're breaking both my hands
They're breaking both my hands
And telling me to
Take it like a man
And take it like a man
Well fuck that
I don't understand
Said I don't understand
So please repeat whatever you just said
'cause nothing's making sense
Well how'm I doing?
I gotta great idea
I'm gonna wait right here
I gotta great idea
I'm gonna wait right here
While everything is adding
Up, up, up
Everything is adding
Up, up, up
Well besides the significant cynicism of lyrics, this makes me wanna go CLUBBING.
Saturday, 25 September 2010
Monday, 20 September 2010
ok. 20 days on and deadline this week and noooooooo i still havent finished my skt. i'm going to pretend no one's gonna ask me for fail meja. despite audit. i'm going to pretend raya nudged audit into the corner and through the wall and then beyond. yeah!
but that still leaves me with skt. yeah should stop moaning and start doing. hmmm. did that last night, didnt get far, had to rely on benadryl for sleep. skit is not a way to start your monday and the rest of the week, by the way. then again, i woke up to having to keep a watchful eye on dis and psy and msw and fsw and my own mmw and then as i was hyperventilating wondering where to go now what else should come along but the news that there's a dmtac patient here for appointment and oh btw dmtac pharmacist took el without telling anyone and the only way i found out was asking the ppf in charge of leave and that yeah she took last fri off which i signed for, but as far as he knew she didnt take monday off, but she did mention to him that she may take mc on monday see how. tell me how does a person predict 5 days in advance when she'll take mc, and barring some especial illness, what sort of person doesnt give heads up to the indirectly responsible next in line only because i signed her leave last friday but definitely not today fuck. and then the dmtac patient had to go hypo on me. i hope i didnt overhyperglycaemize him but anyway. one tablespoon of sugar in hot water aint seven tablespoons of sugar in a can of coke and some people take two cans for hypo. yes uncle i saw that dreamy happy look you had when you described yr near death experience and hypo is hardly a reason for you to catch up on coke.
luckily dis/psy girl came back at 11am. luckily i decided to screw fsw and u44 helped me with msw. luckily only 2 patients for dmtac today. luckily today i didnt have the energy to care too much about my ward and fuck it la, 1 cubicle and 2 counseling should pretty much do it for the day. you know the problem? too many to mention but let it be known that one should never tk 3 people at one go. especially since one is direct stand in for leave-trigger-happy dmtac pharmacist. especially if one is already juggling two portfolios and hang it, everyone's juggling two portfolios. hey not bad! today i juggled 8 portfolios. actually in the end i effectively only did... two and a half. so much for the self esteem.
i dont know where to start, really. i could rant and rave against the proverbial system for letting things come to this... but really. i could have taken today as a chance to prioritize and demonstrate some effective time management. and capability. instead of bawling my eyes out to management. but can anyone divvy themselves into 8? alright. i should never have signed 3 people's leaves. actually 2! and now we go back to the fucked up system.
aaaaaaaaaaand there's still skt. actually it's 10pm. time to sleep. tomorrow... is a clinic day. should i run to mmw for am rounds or should i take the time instead to brief deployed frp to cover dmtac for the week? fuck this isnt even my job. one good thing about fail meja: IT CLEARLY DELINEATES MY JOB FROM THE OTHER POINTLESS SHIT which eventually i'll have to do anyway cos fail meja means peanuts. fuck. and then and then i'm not done yet. then i have warfarin clinic which i run by myself am then pm i have a brand new prp following me so at least that makes the two of us. whatever. ok /rant this is just a waste of time.
at least i dont need benadryl tonight.
but that still leaves me with skt. yeah should stop moaning and start doing. hmmm. did that last night, didnt get far, had to rely on benadryl for sleep. skit is not a way to start your monday and the rest of the week, by the way. then again, i woke up to having to keep a watchful eye on dis and psy and msw and fsw and my own mmw and then as i was hyperventilating wondering where to go now what else should come along but the news that there's a dmtac patient here for appointment and oh btw dmtac pharmacist took el without telling anyone and the only way i found out was asking the ppf in charge of leave and that yeah she took last fri off which i signed for, but as far as he knew she didnt take monday off, but she did mention to him that she may take mc on monday see how. tell me how does a person predict 5 days in advance when she'll take mc, and barring some especial illness, what sort of person doesnt give heads up to the indirectly responsible next in line only because i signed her leave last friday but definitely not today fuck. and then the dmtac patient had to go hypo on me. i hope i didnt overhyperglycaemize him but anyway. one tablespoon of sugar in hot water aint seven tablespoons of sugar in a can of coke and some people take two cans for hypo. yes uncle i saw that dreamy happy look you had when you described yr near death experience and hypo is hardly a reason for you to catch up on coke.
luckily dis/psy girl came back at 11am. luckily i decided to screw fsw and u44 helped me with msw. luckily only 2 patients for dmtac today. luckily today i didnt have the energy to care too much about my ward and fuck it la, 1 cubicle and 2 counseling should pretty much do it for the day. you know the problem? too many to mention but let it be known that one should never tk 3 people at one go. especially since one is direct stand in for leave-trigger-happy dmtac pharmacist. especially if one is already juggling two portfolios and hang it, everyone's juggling two portfolios. hey not bad! today i juggled 8 portfolios. actually in the end i effectively only did... two and a half. so much for the self esteem.
i dont know where to start, really. i could rant and rave against the proverbial system for letting things come to this... but really. i could have taken today as a chance to prioritize and demonstrate some effective time management. and capability. instead of bawling my eyes out to management. but can anyone divvy themselves into 8? alright. i should never have signed 3 people's leaves. actually 2! and now we go back to the fucked up system.
aaaaaaaaaaand there's still skt. actually it's 10pm. time to sleep. tomorrow... is a clinic day. should i run to mmw for am rounds or should i take the time instead to brief deployed frp to cover dmtac for the week? fuck this isnt even my job. one good thing about fail meja: IT CLEARLY DELINEATES MY JOB FROM THE OTHER POINTLESS SHIT which eventually i'll have to do anyway cos fail meja means peanuts. fuck. and then and then i'm not done yet. then i have warfarin clinic which i run by myself am then pm i have a brand new prp following me so at least that makes the two of us. whatever. ok /rant this is just a waste of time.
at least i dont need benadryl tonight.
Thursday, 16 September 2010
I'm a stupid stupid girl who keeps on getting into stupid situations.It's amazing how I could get stuck in these tight little corners. Maybe I should just not care and things will get better,
But you are wrong you see, to not care is to be indifferent. And I can't. If I could rewind my whole past again and edit it, yes I would. The older me could go back and visit the younger me. Tell her to not do all these mistakes that we have done. Tell her to stay away from people who will end up breaking your heart and forming the cynical you that you are today. Tell her that its not even worth being friends with them. Crash and burn. They'll take you for granted. Step all over you because you let them. They never cared about you. Never. And if the younger me didn't take all those advice, she's the idiot that I am today.
Wednesday, 1 September 2010
Friday, 20 August 2010
I don't understand why the bloody government service is so fucking inefficient when there are shit loads of government servants working there! And I mean shit loads!
There. I said what was on everybody's mind. Inefficient government servants with their "minum pagi, minum petang" culture are dead weights. Discard them and I won't be surprised if things run much faster. It's like we are paying them to be the lazy bums they are. Fuck!
Sunday, 15 August 2010
Monday, 9 August 2010
I miss you guys. I dont want to go back into work tomorrow.
Funny thing how things I thought I'd most enjoy were a little overrated, and contentment and the flashes of pure happy excitement were where I didnt even think about.
Probably a bit too utopiac to wish to work with you guys. But I missed this. The day to day ease with people you can be crazy with. Maybe down the line we'd be at each others' throats. But the laughing (not all but most) was so easy.
Thanks 1787. You love all of us so much.
Funny thing how things I thought I'd most enjoy were a little overrated, and contentment and the flashes of pure happy excitement were where I didnt even think about.
Probably a bit too utopiac to wish to work with you guys. But I missed this. The day to day ease with people you can be crazy with. Maybe down the line we'd be at each others' throats. But the laughing (not all but most) was so easy.
Thanks 1787. You love all of us so much.
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